Prince William & Princess Kate, the Duke & Duchess of Cambridge

It began with Kate’s request that ladies wear hats and oh the fascinators were out in all of their glory!  Watching the guests arrive was nothing short of watching the red carpet on Oscar’s Night.  And did you see David and Victoria Beckham?!  Becks was a dapper showstopper in his mourning coat – the camera’s couldn’t stop going back to him.

Princesses Eugenie & Beatrice

The ever-so-stylish Beckhams

Classic elegance by Mother of the Bride Carole Middleton, The Queen and Step-Mother of the Groom Camilla

Kate wore a classically elegant and beautiful dress reminiscent of Princess Grace (actress Grace Kelly) by Sarah Burton for Alexander McQueen and carried a modest bouquet.  According to the royal press release, “The bouquet is a shield-shaped wired bouquet of myrtle, lily-of-the-valley, sweet William and hyacinth. The bouquet was designed by Shane Connolly and draws on the traditions of flowers of significance for the Royal Family, the Middleton family and on the Language of Flowers.”   Kate also looked beautiful wearing a borrowed vintage Cartier halo tiara given to Queen Elizabeth by the Queen Mother on her 18^th birthday.

Kate Middleton entering Westminster Abbey wearing Sara Burton for McQueen reflected her own personal style. Simple, classic and elegant.

William looked absolutely regal in his scarlet red uniform of Colonel of the Irish Guards topped with a blue sash.  The royal wedding party stylishly mimicked the bride and groom with Prince Harry in his military uniform and bucking tradition, sister of the bride and maid of honor Pippa wearing an ivory gown.  I thought it was a stunning move and I bet we’ll be seeing this again!

Prince Will to his father-in-law, "We were just supposed to have a small family affair."

Maid of Honor and Sister of the Bride, Pippa Middleton escorts the flower girls

The dashing Princes

A Historic first - TWO balcony kisses!

The trees lining the halls of Westminster Abbey were Canadian Maples brought in to  honor the Commonwealth of Canada (Oh Canada! My home and native land…)

In a dramatic twist Prince William did the first wardrobe change and switched to his blue RAF flight lieutenant’s uniform for the couple’s stylish and historic getaway driving his Dad’s, Prince Charles, Astin Martin (I’m sure all you grooms out there are having car envy!!)  The couple enjoyed some quiet time to themselves before rejoining the festivities.

Today Prince William was the envy of every gent. He got the Princess & the Astin Martin!

The Queen’s reception following the wedding is only the first party of  the day and will feature an 8-tiered regal bridal fruit cake AND a chocolate biscuit Groom’s cake (the groom’s favorite).

The Royal Wedding Cake

Royal Wedding style takeaways:

• Honor tradition, but make your wedding your own in small details.  Those small nods to your personal style will really stand out. 
• Give your guests direction with wedding attire, be it traditional or fun Destination Wedding twists like “gentlemen in Tropical Shirts, ladies in sundresses and bejeweled flip flops” or ask your guests to dress in shades of your wedding color.  Make your guests a part of the décor. (Result:  really great wedding images!!)
• Channel your inner-Princess with a vintage tiara http://www.vintagetiarasbyjuliabeazley.com/Home.html
• Switch up your processional from the American tradition of having the bridesmaids and bridal party walk ahead of the bride and make a royal entrance with them trailing you.  This is actually a great idea on the beach where often wedding dress trains can snag or pick up “hitchhikers” along the way.
• Go Green!  See former SunCelebrity Hollis’ Princess Perfect Destination Wedding on St Croix – Perhaps Princess Kate stole some of her fairytale style?! 
• Build in a little quiet time after the ceremony just to yourselves in order to center yourselves and truly be in the moment.
• Throw your groom a bone and include a Groom’s cake of his choosing – or surprise him with one in his favorite flavor. Afterall, its his wedding too!

The Kapok (Ceiba pentandra) or Silk Cotton tree is indigenous to the rainforests of South America and is now spread throughout the Caribbean, West Africa and even as far as the Malay Peninsula and Indonesian archipelago.  Pollinated by bats, the tree sheds its leaves during the dry winter months with leaves and white or pink flowers remerging during the wetter spring months. It produces brown seed pods that contain a fibrous, fluffy white material that is 8-times lighter than cotton and 5-times more buoyant than cork.  Before synthetics, the fibers were used in pillows, mattresses and because it is water-proof, were used in flotation devices.  The leaves and bark can be used medicinally to cure a variety of ailments, including Type II diabetes.  The Kapok’s straight trunk is supported by huge beautiful buttresses that can extend out 30-feet, surround the trunk and are covered with spikes protecting the otherwise smooth bark.  Kapoks can exceed heights of 150 feet.

The Mayans revered the Ceiba (say-bah) as the tree of life whose roots extended to the underworld and branches reached up to support the heavens. It was used to make large and sturdy, sea-worthy canoes that allowed them to travel from island to island.   In West Indian culture, this mighty behemoth was considered a sacred spirit tree. Referred to as the “God Tree”, “Devil Tree” or “Jumbie Tree” it is believed to be inhabited by spirits.  Cutting down a Kapok would release the spirits and the culprit would be haunted for years.

Known as the “jumbie tree” to many natives, the kapok has long been considered a primary spirit tree of the West Indies. With its huge buttressed roots and gargantuan dimensions the kapok can’t help but draw the eye and fire the imagination. “In a traditional environment devoid of man-made wonders such as towers and temples, obelisks, and so forth,” writes Nicholls, “a ficus or kapok would stand out and it is not so surprising that these trees were identified as spirit trees.” Kapok trees were considered a holding place for departed souls and a place where the living could meet the dead. Eggs were thrown at certain kapoks that were known to be spirit trees in order to free a person’s shadow or soul that had been stolen by a jumbie.  – Professor Robert W. Nicholls, University of the Virgin Islands

The incredible Kapok that anchors the property and is the logo symbol of Villa Greenleaf on St Croix has been estimated by experts to be approximately 350 years old making it one of the oldest and largest trees in the US Virgin Islands.  Lovingly and carefully attended to, the tree’s breathtaking beauty can be marveled at while enjoying breakfast at the Villa/Bed and Breakfast.  It’s been the subject of many artists and on your next visit to Villa Greenleaf I’m sure you’ll discover why.

Monkey No Climb!

Since cruising couples have a shortened time on the island – first we meet them and escort them directly to the Superior Court to have them sworn in for their Marriage License, then its straight on to the ceremony spot.  I find that most of our brides take advantage of the onboard spas prior to meeting with me and always look wedding day perfect! 

By hiring a wedding planner for your Cruise ship wedding, you ensure that even with a tight schedule things run smoothly and you simply enjoy your special day.  We carefully craft timelines that get you where you need to be, when you need to be there.  We coordinate the Officiant, photographer and transportation so that all you need to do is slip into your wedding day attire and walk down the aisle.  We even offer customized packages for short receptions.  The beauty of having someone who lives in your port is that we know what locations are going to be crowded with fellow passengers and which spots may be a little more quiet and romantic.  We also know how long it takes to get from point A to point B and all the little nuances in between.

If you are visiting St Croix on a cruise ship and want to get married while you’re here – Contact Us Today – or view some of our Elope packages to get you started.  We are always available to offer a custom quote for couples who want a little more.

To see some of the Cruise Ship Weddings we’ve done – check out:

Jenny and Randy  :: Feb 2, 2011 visiting aboard the Royal Caribbean Serenade of the Seas

Jocielyn & Steve :: Dec 8, 2009 visiting aboard the Celebrity Millenium

St Croix, VI  – February 2, 2011 – WeddingWire, the nation’s leading wedding technology company, is thrilled to announce SunCelebrations has been selected to receive the prestigious annual WeddingWire Bride’s Choice Awards™ 2011 in the Wedding Planner category.  This is SunCelebrations third consecutive win, having been awarded in 2009 and 2010.  SunCelebrations is the only wedding planning firm in the entire US Virgin Islands to claim this three-peat distinction.

Recognition for the Bride’s Choice Awards™ 2011 is determined by recent reviews and extensive surveys from over 750,000 WeddingWire newlyweds. Our past clients are among those that shared their experiences on WeddingWire, the largest wedding review site in the nation.

SunCelebrations  stands among the top five percent of wedding professionals in the WeddingWire community, representing quality and service excellence within the wedding industry. Awards were given to the top wedding professionals across 20 service categories, from wedding venues to wedding photographers, and were based on the overall professional achievements throughout the past year.

“WeddingWire is honored to celebrate the success of the top-rated wedding professionals within the WeddingWire community,” said Timothy Chi, WeddingWire’s Chief Executive Officer. “With the annual Bride’s Choice Awards™ program, WeddingWire has the unique opportunity to recognize the best wedding professionals across the US and Canada. We applaud SunCelebrations for their professionalism and dedication to enhancing the wedding planning experience last year.”

We are happy to announce that SunCelebrations  is among the very best Wedding Planners within the WeddingWire Network, which includes leading wedding planning sites WeddingWire, Martha Stewart Weddings, Project Wedding and Weddingbee. We would like to thank our past clients for nominating us to receive the Bride’s Choice Awards™ 2011.

For more information, please visit our WeddingWire Storefront today at www.weddingwire.com/suncelebrations

For more information on the Bride’s Choice Awards™ 2011, please visit www.WeddingWire.com .

About SunCelebrations

SunCelebrations, the US Virgin Islands leading destination wedding business, has been making wedding couples dreams come true for almost 10 years. For engaged couples, SunCelebrations offers both wedding planning and travel expertise via award-winning wedding expert and owner Cindy Clearwater’s careful guidance.  All clients have access to their restricted website, an invaluable resource that includes ideas and referrals for everything from venue options and accommodations to photographers and  wedding cakes. SunCelebrations has been voted ‘Best Wedding Planner in the US Virgin Islands’ 2010 by the Readers of the Virgin Islands Daily News and is a three-time recipient of WeddingWire.com Bride’s Choice Awards™ for 2009, 2010 and 2011.

About WeddingWire, Inc.

WeddingWire.com, the nation’s leading technology company serving the $70 billion wedding industry, is the only online wedding planning resource designed to empower both engaged couples and wedding professionals. For engaged couples, WeddingWire offers the ability to search, compare and book over 200,000 local wedding vendors, from wedding venues to wedding photographers to wedding cakes. WeddingWire also offers an online community and a suite of cutting-edge planning tools for weddings, including wedding websites and wedding checklists, all at no charge. For wedding professionals, WeddingWire provides free online management tools creating the only market opportunity that gives local businesses control over their clients, reviews, leads and performance. Businesses that join the WeddingWire Network appear on WeddingWire.com and other leading sites, including MarthaStewartWeddings.com (NYSE: MSO), ProjectWedding.com and Weddingbee.com (both part of eHarmony), and Celebrations.com (part of the 1-800-Flowers family of brands, NASDAQ: FLWS).

So, do them a favor and shop in advance for your own gifts by registering online with your favorite retailer. Registering online is easy and fun – afterall you are shopping without spending $$

Be sure to include information on your registries (yes, you can sign up for more than one) in your invitations (and don’t forget usernames and passwords if needed) *and* on your wedding website! (I can’t stress enough how invaluable wedding websites are)

… Here are a few ideas/suggestions for some alternative registry options as well:

> Honeymoon Registries
A growing trend, particularly for couples who ALREADY have two toasters and plenty of blenders. We like Traveler’s Joy You simply set up an account, choose your options and guests can help to fund your parasailing, jet skiing and dining delights.

Why we like it: They have one of the lowest fees in the industry at 7.5%; no set up fee and no guest fee. What this means is that you will not be charged anything to set up the account, your guests won’t be charged anything, but when you cash out for your honeymoon Traveler’s Joy will keep $7.50 of every $100 for their services. Not bad, right?!
Visit Traveler’s Joy for Honeymoon Tips

*Hot Tip* :: Have an Island-themed “Jack & Jill” shower to get in the Destination Wedding mood and let your guests know in advance that you have a honeymoon registry! This is also a great way to celebrate with friends and loved ones who may not be able to make the trip.

> Be Charitable
Some couples simply have enough “stuff” and don’t really want more nor do they want their guests to feel obligated to purchase anything for them. However, some guests really feel compelled to offer a gift of some sort, so why not support a charitable cause that you feel strongly about?
The I Do Foundation is an EXCELLENT resource. You can set up a registry here offering an easy way for your guests to celebrate your new life together with the cause of your choice. The website is also full of ideas for ways to be more charitable and eco-consious in all of your wedding planning.

Another great idea: Make a charitable donation INSTEAD of favors at your wedding and then print a note on placecards.

Example: In June of 2009, Rose & Jeff, both physicians, got married here on St Croix. On the table were placecards with guests’ names and a note: In lieu of favors we have made a donation to ‘Doctors without Borders’

> Some of my favorite Gift Registries
I’ve included links directly to the registry pages for you to easily set things up:

• Williams & Sonoma
• Crate & Barrel
• Pottery Barn
• Macy’s
• Home Depot
• Bed Bath & Beyond

Do you have a favorite registry that you think other brides would love? Let us know and we’ll add it to the list!

My New Year's Eve travel delay was made a little better with freshly steamed Maine Lobster and Legal Seafood Clam Chowder for dinner with family!

I hope that everyone had an excellent time celebrating the dawn of 2011.  I had the unexpected pleasure of spending it with family which was really nice, however it was the result of a travel delay returning from the Boston area (did you hear about the day-after-Christmas Blizzard?! Well, my delay was mechanical but further complicated by the week of excessive cancellations and delays).  My personal experience wasn’t too bad, I was able to go back to my mother’s home and start over the next day which so many were not able to do. I’m a pretty savvy traveler and requested to be rebooked the next day after spending 5 1/2 hours waiting to find out if the plane would ever take off … and knowing that there was little to no chance I would catch my connecting flight in San Juan to St Croix… did you know you can do that?!  So, it inspired me to blog about my experience and  offer some tips from a seasoned traveler and destination wedding planner.

I seem to have had “challenging” luck when travelling over the past year and a half.  Over the past 4 times I have travelled home from Boston to St Croix, I’ve been over-nighted somewhere 3 times.  And once the year before that.  Thankfully, this isn’t as prevalent as it sounds, I just seem to be “lucky” (hey universe, I’d prefer the lottery kind of luck, thank you).  The first time in 2009 was a mechanical or scheduling issue in San Juan (the airline covered hotel and food); the second was Dec 29, 2009 when the entire San Juan airport was shut down due to volcanic ash from Montserrat (a nearby volcanic island); the third was in April, major storms that caused tornadoes and severe damage were passing through the Miami airspace as we were supposed to land… we were diverted and the delays caused me to miss my connection; Dec 31, 2010 our plane had mechanical issues. 

Because of my extensive experience with delays, frequency of travel and being affiliated with the travel industry I have a few very important tips to pass along: 

1. Insurance, Insurance – use it!  I fly American Airlines whenever I can www.aa.com (I like to stick with one airline and rack up the mileage).  When booking a ticket online, it always asks me before finalizing my purchase if I want to add the optional insurance.  I didn’t used to purchase, though its typically only about $30, I do now after having been out hundreds of dollars on hotel rooms.  If your trip is delayed or cancelled due to weather – you are responsible for any expenses or losses NOT the airline.  Think about it, they would go out of business in a day… they can’t control the weather and have a vested interest in keeping us safe.  So, every time you travel, you are taking a gamble that the weather all along your flight path will be good for flying.  By adding the optional insurance, if you have a weather delay and need to overnight somewhere, you may be out of pocket that night, but insurance will reimburse you up to a certain amount.  (read the fine print before purchasing; Know what’s covered and what’s not; Make your own informed decision).  Some credit cards that you use may also have built-in travel insurance, so check that out as well.  I have an AAdvantage Card that has some perks for me when I use it to book airfare. 
2. If booking an expensive vacation, destination wedding or cruise… check out cruise insurance or wedding insurance (I recommend www.wedsafe.com ) and travel to the destination at least 1 day ahead of time.  Sadly on the past two of my delays, I was among many passengers travelling to catch a cruise that day.  They didn’t make it.  At that point they had two choices,  rebook to the ship’s next port of call and get on board there or head home.  Those that didn’t have insurance were simply out of luck and out of money, a lot of money.  Don’t take that chance!  If you are travelling for a destination wedding be very mindful of Marriage License requirements.  On St Croix, you MUST be sworn in at the Superior Court prior to your wedding to make it legal.  They are only open M-F and are closed on MANY holidays.  This is one of the critical reasons to hire a wedding planner – be sure you are able to be sworn in and make it legal.  Consult with your wedding planner PRIOR to booking air and arrive a day or two ahead of time, particularly in the winter months when travel is more likely to be delayed.
3. Be informed! Know your rights!  When I have been delayed, each time I IMMEDIATELY went up to the flight desk and inquired about a new routing to get me to my destination.  On my most recent delay, our flight was repeatedly delayed.  After the second delay, I calculated our arrival time in San Juan (I have the AA app on my iPhone which is really useful when traveling) and realized that there was little to no chance of me making my connection.  It was New Year’s Eve and I knew my choices were being over-nighted alone in San Juan or going home to my family’s house and starting over the next day.  I opted for the latter even though I did have trip insurance that would reimburse my hotel room. (and it was a mechanical issue, so the airline was also responsible for hotel).  I went up to the flight desk and requested to be rebooked the next day.  I was polite and patient (unlike many fellow travelers who were understandably frustrated) and was even given a complementary upgrade to business class.
4. Carry on essentials and overnight items! If you are travelling for a destination wedding, always pack any wedding essentials (shoes, under garments, bride and groom wedding attire, jewelry) in your carry-on and carry on your dress. When boarding, ask the flight attendants to hang your dress in the first-class cabin (they are always happy to oblige).  And be sure to pack pajamas, a swim suit (if headed to a warm destination) and a change of clothes.  That way if you are over-nighted, you are prepared.  Additionally, its not unusual during times of heavy air travel for your baggage to arrive later to your destination than you.  By having the essentials and at least a days worth of backup, you can avoid undue stress and roll with it if your things are delayed.
5. Remember the 3-1-1 Rule http://www.tsa.gov/311/  Each passenger may carry-on liquids (this includes lip gloss and mascara ladies!) of 3oz or less, packed in a transparent 1-quart zip lock or similar see-thru cosmetic bag, 1 per passenger.  Additionally, when you hit the security screening line, take out your transparent bag and put it in a bin on top of your things.  (take off your jacket and your shoes, take out any laptops in advance as well – this will speed you through the line).  I have a bag that I keep in my carry-on that is pre-loaded with sample sizes of things I need that I collect throughout the year (free gift with purchase samples are perfect for this).  That way when I travel I am ready to go and travel efficiently.  Remember that if you carry-on larger bottles (like full-sized shampoo) they WILL take it away from you.
6. Be prepared, Be Informed and Be Patient!  You will reduce your own travel stress level if you have thought ahead, packed smartly and have all of your travel and insurance info in-hand.  Be sure to know your rights as a traveler and your responsibilities.  (You are responsible for asking for “stranded traveler hotel rates”, calling the airline or going to the flight desk to request a rerouting, etc)  Speak up if you are delayed and if you feel the flight desk isn’t helping you, call the airlines 800# for assistance (you can do that to begin with too).  Be patient with flight attendants and flight desk personnel.  They are often dealing with numerous agitated and frustrated travelers who take their frustration and confusion out on them.  The weather and mechanical issues are not their fault.  And though they are in customer service and are supposed to deal with these issues, they are human too.  A kind word and some understanding can go a long way to getting you to your destination.  Be kind, be gracious and you can be assured they will do the best they can do for you.

create & buy custom products at Zazzle

Hollis channeled her inner Cinderella for a fairy-tale beach wedding on St Croix

How many of you out there spent your childhood dreaming of being a Disney Princess and planning your fairytale wedding to your Prince Charming?  Well now you can make that fantasy a reality with Disney’s new line of princess-inspired wedding gowns by Alfred Angelo.

• The treasures of the sea inspired Ariel’s gown. The mermaid silhouette features re-embroidered lace, pearl beading, and sequin sparkles.  [add to that the beautiful backdrop of the Caribbean Sea and  you've made our "Little Mermaid" fantasy a reality!]
• Aurora/Sleeping Beauty’s gown is romantic with a dreamy, willowy skirt for this slumbering princess.
• Belle’s wedding dress, with a draped waistline is inspired by the iconic ballroom dance scene from the film and focuses on making a grand entrance.
• Cinderella’s gown radiates with sparkle as its inspiration is the fairy tale’s enchanted glass slipper.
• Jasmine’s wedding dress conveys freedom and individuality and as a result her shimmering soft satin gown is exotic with a bejeweled neckline and low cut back.
• Snow White’s dress is inspired by nature, beauty and grace like the Disney Princess character herself.
• The regal, one-shoulder taffeta gown for our newest princess, Tiana, reflects her independent spirit with an asymmetric bodice and ruched skirt.

I often have brides ask me if its appropriate to wear a full gown for a beach wedding and I say YES, YES, YES!  In fact, the majority of my brides wear long gowns on the beach.  I do, however, have a few tips that go along with that decision:

• When choosing your dress, be mindful of the train.  Long, flowing trains with a lot of lace will tend to pick up “hitch hikers” (bits of flotsam and jetsam) on the beach as you walk down the aisle.  They can also snag on small sticks and bits of coral or rock, so I don’t recommend having a long and lacy train or veil.
• You WILL get hot in the tropics.  Consider having a second, lighter dress on-hand to change into after the formalities are over.  Keep it in the bridal theme and have fun with it.  Think fun and flirty white cocktail dress with sequins or choose a gown with a single-layer of breathable fabric.  This is also a great way to signal a transition in the evening to your guests – from the formal aspects to the full-on “party down” mode!
• Be kind to your groom and bridal party!  While it may be your life-long dream to wear a long formal gown, its probably not theirs.  Choose bridesmaid dresses that are tea or cocktail length with halter, spaghetti strap or strapless necklines.  Choose natural fabrics like linen or cotton and avoid synthetics.  J. Crew has a fantastic line of affordable dresses great for the beach.    Be sure that you and your bridesmaids bring bathing suits that match the neckline of your dress to avoid tell-tale tan lines!
• For your groom and his guys choose short sleeved Guyabera’s (traditional linen embroidered Latin wedding shirts) or light-weight suits.  By taking the time to think about the comfort of your royal subjects, you will truly be a fairy-tale princess to them!

This past summer May bride Hollis made her princess wedding dreams come true with her island destination wedding!  Though she had actually considered a Disney wedding in Florida, she and her now husband’s love of St Croix won out.  Inspired by her love of Disney princesses Belle and Cinderella, we worked together to create a fairy-tale beach wedding fit for royalty.

• The bride channeled her inner Cinderella with an ivory gown with full skirt, beaded bodice and large bow in the back.
• The ceremony aisle was lined with pink bougainvillea in conch shells and bunches of greenery that led up to romantic topiaries giving the beach a royal feel.  Bows of Loden green bichon silk added the final touch.
• The flowers by Antilles Lilies had a whimsical, fantasy feel with purple and green spider mums, large pink stargazer lilies and red roses.
• The reception décor was given a royal flair with rented gold Chiavari chairs and gilded gold chargers.  Dining tables were set with ivory linen and cocktail tables adorned with Loden silk clothes and red ties added the final touch.
• The bride carried the theme into her musical selections, dancing with her father to “Cinderella” by Steven Curtis Chapman (an absolutely beautiful choice for a father-daughter dance for any wedding!)
• Since they married on Cinco-de-Mayo we added in a little nod to the holiday serving Margheritas and chips and salsa!

The six day "feastable" includes gourmet dinners, wine tastings and culinary competitions.

If the way to you or your sweetie’s heart is through food, then this is the perfect week to be on on-island to experience the third annual, St. Croix Food and Wine Experience. Dubbed one of the best International Food and Wine events by  Forbes Magazine’s, the six day festival includes gourmet dinners, wine tasting, culinary competitions and, beginning this year, a golf tournament.

Celebrity chefs and vintners will team up with local islands chefs for a unique dining experiences at different restaurants and private homes around St. Croix.

On Thursday night over 50 restaurants, chefs and caterers will take part in the event that started it all nine years ago, A Taste of St. Croix. Over 1,000 visitors and residents will get to feast on dishes that make up the vibrant culinary scene on St. Croix.

Celebrity chefs call St. Croix home for the week. Pictured Rocco DiSpirito.

Whether you prefer Italian, Thai, Greek or West Indian cuisines, you’ll have plenty of delicious dining options while on St. Croix. If you are hoping for an intimate reception with fresh lobster or a buffet featuring locally grown goods, the restaurants and chefs on St. Croix can accommodate all of your needs.  We are fortunate to live on an island so rich in culinary talent. We may not have the dining options of New York City, but there isn’t much that the professionals on St. Croix can’t do. Need help with restaurant suggestions for guests or when planning your rehearsal dinner? No problem, just ask! We’re happy to rave about all the top notch dining options on-island.

Most every lady has been there – either as a bridesmaid dealing with a bridezilla, or as a bride disappointed by an uninvolved, unenthused bridesmaid. Neither party is necessarily to blame, but when the most important day in a girl’s life is at stake, the pressure is on for everyone to smile and everything to run smoothly. Miscommunication, false expectations, and feelings of burden or obligation, can call lead to shaky situations within bridal parties.

I have heard countless horror stories . . . I had a friend so embarrassed by her bridesmaid dress, that she carried a cocktail dress in her purse to change into the moment professional wedding photos were finished. A friend of a friend who was a graduate student at the time, had to set-up a yearlong payment plan with the bride’s family to repay them for the designer bridesmaid dress chosen for her by the bride. It goes without saying that in both these cases, the bride and bridesmaid were not the best of friends after the wedding.

As a recent bride and event planner turned wedding professional, I thought I would share some ideas on how to keep everyone happy and foster even stronger friendships after the wedding.

How brides can make their bridesmaids happy . . .

For my wedding in St Croix earlier this year, I included bridal party accommodations in my wedding budget. Footing the bill for a bridal suite not only lessened my bridesmaids’ travel expenses, but provided a slumber party-like environment for us to bond. On my wedding day, I offered to pay for a manicure or pedicure for each bridesmaid, so that we could get ready together in the resort spa.

Before the big day, I decided to make the dreaded bridesmaid dress a pleasant experience for all. I chose a fabric and color and let my bridesmaids choose the design of their dress through Aria. The cost of the dresses also came from my wedding budget. I had the dresses shipped directly to my bridesmaids, so that they could have them tailored to their liking. Since our ceremony was barefoot on the beach, I suggested a shoe type and color for the reception, and let my bridesmaids choose a pair from their closet collections. I made my bridesmaid gift their accessory, a hammered silver hook bracelet from Sonya’s Limited, the local company that originally began crafting the traditional island bracelet more than 40 years ago.

But the single most important thing I did as a bride to keep my bridesmaids happy was hire a wedding coordinator. SunCelebrations, the company I now coordinate with, executed my plans and took care of everything on my wedding day so that my bridesmaids and I could just relax and enjoy. In previous experiences as a bridesmaid, I had done everything from bleach outdoor chairs in the heat, to run last-minute beauty errands in the snow. I did not want my bridesmaids setting-up my ceremony or doing any of the dirty work (especially since they were on vacation too). Hiring a wedding coordinator was essential to keeping my wedding party happy.

What it takes to be a bridesmaid that remains friends with the bride after her wedding . . .

First and foremost, only say “yes” to a bride’s request to be a bridesmaid if you truly want to be a part of her big day. Particularly in situations where you’re a cousin or distant relative of the bride, you have the right to say “no thank you” upfront in a tasteful manner. Consider before agreeing if you really have the time and money necessary to devote to the wedding.

To maintain your sanity during stressful or frustrating times, remember that being a bridesmaid is an honor. By asking you to be part of her wedding, the bride is acknowledging that you have made a significant impact on her life. There are likely a handful of her family members and friends that are jealous they were not asked to be bridesmaids.

To not break the bank as a bridesmaid, consider making a gift for the bride. The couple will be overwhelmed with store-bought gifts from their wedding registries, so a handmade gift will stand out in a positive way. The most meaningful gift I received as a bride was a wedding keepsake box from my maid of honor. She simply covered a hat box with magazine cutouts of phrases and photos related to my wedding. The thought and time she put into it meant so much to me.

To keep the bride happy, try to plan ahead for a stress-free wedding day. Plan for the bridal party to get pedicures together at a spa, or participate in a calming activity like a yoga class. Surprise the bride with fruit and champagne to celebrate before the ceremony.

To stay organized, try creating an inbox folder for all wedding-related e-mails the bride and fellow bridesmaids send you. Put mailed invitations on your fridge so that you don’t have to bug the bride for times or directions on days of wedding events, like bridal showers.

Regarding the bridesmaid dress, try to happily wear whatever the bride asks you to. It boils down to a few hours wearing a dress you never have to wear again. Every guest is aware that your dress was the bride’s choice, so they will not judge you if it is a train wreck. Afterward, give your bridesmaid dress to a local Glass Slipper Project that recycles formals for girls to wear at school dances, who could not otherwise afford them. Just in case the bride ever asks, you gave the bridesmaid dress to a good cause.

In the end remember . . .

Brides: Don’t get caught-up in the silly details. Focus your attention on what your wedding is all about – you and your fiancé committing your lives to one another.

Bridesmaids: It is only one day, so just give it to the bride and enjoy.